Are You Listening?

It’s not stalking… not really.

I love you, I’m just scared that you’ll leave me and I know you know how much that would hurt me. When I stand in the shadows or sit in my car watching you, it’s just that I want to know you are safe, that no-one is bothering you, no-one is tainting you. I couldn’t take it if you weren’t in my life, I would have no reason to live. I need you to be there, in my eyes, in my mind.

Yesterday, when you bought that new top I knew you were buying it with me in mind. I watched you look at all the different things on display in the store I saw you touch the ones you liked and I followed you, looking at the things you’d looked at. I knew which one you were going to pick, it’s my favourite colour and I know it will look good against your skin.

On your way home I sat three seats behind you on the bus but you didn’t notice me, I was very discreet. I saw you speaking to that student type and I knew he was making your skin creep. I knew that laugh you gave him was hiding what you really felt… disgust. I wanted to come up behind him and hit him, I almost did and I knew you would have thanked me but we reached our stop just before I moved.

I love your house, no our house… I know it so well. I have been in every room, looked in every drawer. I have smelt your pillow, your clothes. I know what medication you take, how much your electricity bill is and what’s in your bank account. I know your friends, I know you so well my love and I know you know I do. I know that you feel me watching when you are alone at night. Why else would you look so inviting, why else would you do all the things that you do to make me feel this hunger? The preparations you take to make yourself soft and beautiful, just for me.

I think you liked the present I left you? The rose? I know you kept it and put it in a book. I was excited by the way you looked about you when you found it on your doorstep, as if you wanted me to see you looking for me… I saw you and I want you.